What Makes Dennis LeHane Worth Reading

Most of what I read is crime fiction. We can taste the grit of Los Angeles in the writing of Michael Connelly. Lehane grinds Boston into the enamel. Whether it’s Dorchester or the fictional setting of Shutter Island, we get dropped just a little too close for comfort into the setting of his novels. Streets and parks and triple-layer apartments, he encourages us to hold the hand of the characters and walk with them, see what they see. We don’t mind being led around by the nose because he does it so well. The spiritual questions his people ask are never answered because they’re the same things men and women have been wondering about since the dawn of time. How can people be so evil? Where is God when unspeakable things happen? When was the last time you heard a satisfying reply to the truly hard matters? LeHane and his characters have nothing they can tell you. They’re slogging through the morass, too.

This past month I’ve read three books by him, having already seen the movie adaptations. It’s no wonder they chose his books to bring to film and the screenwriters were faithful to his work. First I read Mystic River, a novel about three friends whose lives are indelibly stamped by the abduction and molestation of Dave. Tim Robbins flat-out earned his Best Supporting Actor Oscar for portraying the adult Dave. The book fleshes out the man trying to overcome his childhood tragedy and live up to Wolf Boy, his alter ego that bravely, narrowly, escaped from his tormentors. What makes him such a haunting character is: How has Dave managed to not get sucked in the maelstrom and become the very thing he hates? Sean Penn won Best Actor for playing Jimmy Markum, neighborhood bad boy who turns his life around (mostly) after the birth of his daughter that is later murdered. Rounding out the trio is Sean Devine (played by Kevin Bacon), the homicide cop investigating the killing, pulled between two loyalties and memories of growing up with the boys of this rough neighborhood.

Next came Shutter Island. LeHane said the location is based on a Massachusetts mental institution he visited as a child. You can feel the moisture dripping from the stone walls. There’s less hope of escaping this forbidding island than Alcatraz. It’s unnerving when the federal marshals (Leonardo DiCaprio and Mark Ruffalo) begin interviewing inmates and the people responsible for their care because some of the patients, at least at first, don’t seem all that insane and not all the wardens are particularly sound of mind, either. While hunting for an escaped patient, there’s the twin threat of a hurricane and downed power lines that open the electric cell doors. It has a whopper of a surprise ending I wouldn’t give away for anything. Read the book first if you haven’t seen the movie.

A few hours ago I finished Gone, Baby, Gone. This thriller about a kidnapped child has as many sharp turns as a mountain road. The characters, a pair of private detectives and several morally challenged cops, are more complicated in their depiction than any I’ve read in quite some time. Especially in these ambiguous times, it’s hard to fault the bad guys for what they’ve done when LeHane makes his argument here against the nauseating abusers of children. Patrick Kinsey (Casey Affleck, brother of director Ben Affleck), the narrator, and his partner Angie Gennaro (Michelle Monaghan) take the job of finding the lost little girl even though they know it’s not going to go well, never dreaming it will end the way it does. Neither does the reader/viewer. Does Patrick do the right thing? It doesn’t matter, in his opinion. He questions only the outcome. Never in his own mind does he doubt himself until it’s too late. In the movie he finishes the job he was hired to do in a manner never predicted. Again, I’m not going to be a spoiler here.

What makes Dennis LeHane worth reading is his ability to draw you in. You can imagine life in a grimy Southie apartments, listening to the neighbors quarrel. You envision the poor living conditions of those unfortunate bastards in C block on Shutter Island. Enter the impoverished quarters of an evil child molester and you want to shoot him, too. Smell the garbage and unwashed bodies. Make your feet move faster to exit the bar before you get a pool cue upside your head.

Mr. LeHane’s Boston is grim and dirty and stricken of hope as it is of money. Drink and drugs are waiting to drag the citizens down as surely as one generation is likely to follow the next in a low-paying job, probably raising a family in the same house they grew up in. The outlook is stark, bleak and humorless. Then, one of his clever people crack a joke ringing with the same irony cops and doctors use in order to do their harrowing jobs and maintain a bit of reserve. You have to laugh, too, because it’s not funny. It’s painfully true to life. Neighbors come together to face tragedy and roast hot dogs while the minimum wage dads crack open a beer, maybe get into a fistfight. Pull a chair onto that sagging front porch of an evening, wave to folks unafraid to take a walk because they’re just as tough as the streets they come from. This is Dorchester.

…And it finally happens!

One could argue that I, at last, wrote something good enough to get paid. Since one of the accepted stories was one I’d already submitted before and had turned down, that would be half true. I’m convinced that what happened is I finally found the right niche for them. Instead of trying to pound my square peg into a round hole, I exerted patience and waited to send them in to publishers that were looking for that kind of story. That way, when the ball came to home plate I hit it out of the park. The pay wasn’t great but I’m a pro now.

I’d read when I started this that most writers still keep their day job. If you’re determined to write short fiction for a living you’ll likely lose your house because the money isn’t that abundant. You have to be really good to get into Clarkesworld or The New Yorker and what writer is prolific enough, or good enough, to hammer out that kind of stuff and keep the lights on? No, I don’t plan to quit my job just yet. What I’m going to do is keep writing, force myself to finish one of the longer works I have (books, ya’ll) mumbling in the backwater of my documents file and shop around for the person most likely to take them home.

If a romance publisher tells you they don’t accept science fiction, don’t send them a romance about a woman who meets a man from outer space. There are places looking for just that kind of thing. Go to the bookstore and browse the racks for who’s printing what, then go online and hunt for publishing houses taking manuscript queries from writers without an agent. Duotrope is supposed to be a good place to start looking. If you’re lucky enough to have an agent, that’s their job.

Join writer’s groups or form one of your own if there isn’t one in your hometown. There are some good ones on social media, too. Often members post places looking for submissions. The more you submit, the more likely you are to get accepted. Keep sending in stuff that won’t pay such as literary journals, though some of those do pay as much as $100. Most don’t pay because they’re running on a shoestring or put out by colleges. Once you get a few publications under your belt you can add that to your cover letter. You’re more likely to get published if you already have been, just as I’ve heard it’s easier to find a job when you already have one.

Don’t just look for magazine or anthology publishers, either. You could get accepted, as I did, by a You Tube audio channel. I also got hired to do a script for an ad. There’s more than one kind of writer but you won’t get your name out there if you never send anything to the right place. Do your research, and for crying out loud, read and believe what they tell you they want. As the saying goes, Submit,wait, fail, submit, wait, fail, submit….

…accepted!

NOTHING ELSE TO DO?

During COVID most Americans have found themselves binge watching television. And why not? You can’t go anywhere except for groceries and take out. Some businesses are opening back up but I get the feeling we’re a long way from being back to normal. Movies and shows about epidemics and disaster are big right now so here’s my top pick for virus movie. 12 Monkeys. You have your pick, the 1995 film directed by Terry Gilliam or the SYFY series which ran from 2015-2018. Haven’t seen them? If you watch one you might as well watch the other.

The movie’s tighter, fast-paced but movies don’t have the luxury of spreading the story over four seasons. The script by Chris Marker and David and Janet Peoples captures the frenetic pace of the hero, sent back in time to find the origin of a plague that’s wiped out most of humanity. His controllers wink him out and back in to check his progress, furthering the mania already present in the poor man. I couldn’t tell if the people kept in cages only large enough to lie down in are potential test subjects for time travel or if everyone lives like this. It’s awful to imagine and the social spacing of these cages is prescient.

Bruce Willis plays James Cole, the traveler, a man driven by his misery to agree to it all and we find him collecting specimens and tracking down Dr. Cassandra Railly, a virologist who left a message for the future. But how did she know? That’s what I love about time paradox films and this one is a whopper. Madeleine Stowe (Dr. Railly) looks quite fragile. She’s anything but as Cole drags her around the city, fueled by his mission, crippled by his mental instability and she gets drawn all the way in to the madness.

Against type, the real corker is Brad Pitt as Jeffrey Goines, the schizophrenic son of Dr. Leland Goines. Pitt got the Oscar for his portrayal of Jeffrey, a young man with a heavy bent on animal rights and anti-corporation, the leaders of a shadowy group called The Army of The Twelve Monkeys. That’s precisely who the future scientists are looking for.

I don’t want to give anything away because three quarters of the thrill in this movie are due to Cole’s flashbacks to a scene at an airport and the real flashes from past to future. The script manages to keep us unaware of what’s going to happen until the last few minutes of the movie.

The series stars Aaron Stanford (X Men) as Cole and Amanda Schull (Devil’s Gate) as Dr. Railly. They did a brilliant piece of casting when they hired Emily Hampshire (Boy Meets Girl) to play Jennifer Goines. It proves that a girl can be as lunatic and mesmerizing as a guy.

Even though I found the series development to be a little far flung at times, it’s still fun to watch. Hampshire’s antics provide much-needed comic relief and there was time to further a romantic sub-plot between Cole and Cassandra. As I already said, I love time travel shows and 12 Monkeys is all about time hopping.

If you care to check it out, both movie and series were based on a 1962 French short film, La Jette, directed by Chris Marker. It’s mostly narration over still photos with the actors never speaking. The time travel is replaced here by post-nuclear. In my current mode of immersion, I’ll probably have to watch it, maybe on You Tube, in spite of their annoying tendency to interrupt with commercials. I hate that crap. Why don’t they have the courtesy to wait until the end so we can hit the stop button? They already post ads that won’t let you skip them and go on to what you wanted to watch in the first place.

I already know the answer. You can’t sell anything that way.

Success…but no money yet

Every writer aspires to be the next Gaiman, Patterson or King. We all want to make beau coup bucks and get invited to appear at major book signings. That was my goal thirty years ago and I suppose it’s still one of my favorite dreams. Now that I’m older I’ve decided to settle for the unacknowledged necessity that is the basis of an author’s ambition: getting published.

You can’t be famous if you’re never published and there are precious few writers that hit one out of the park with their first novel. Most of us have gone for years sending in stuff and getting our feelings crushed with each rejection. Think of what you’ve learned in that time. Your skin got tougher, for one. I bet your chops did, too. When I read some of my old work I think, “Good thing I didn’t send that in.”

I tend to write in short, chopped sentences. My editor says they don’t flow well. There’s no descriptions or feeling to enrich them.

Now, how do I improve what I just wrote?

I have a tendency to write short, chopped sentences that my editor says have none of the natural flow of prose. There’s no adverbs or adjectives to enrich the imagination, no color to give them depth.

Better, but….

I should say “choppy” instead of “chopped”, take out “that”. I’ve used the singular “there’s” instead of the plural because I’m talking about more than one thing with “adverbs and adjectives.”

I have a tendency to write short, choppy sentences my editor says have none of the natural flow of prose. There are no adverbs or adjectives to enrich the imagination or color to give them depth.

When I edit what I’m writing I take out a lot of thats and other determiners. I have to watch my use of “just” when it’s not necessary and guard against the Texan in me to come out in what I’ve typed. It’s okay for your characters to talk in your local dialect but it’s not desirable in the text.

Can you use a comma rather than and and and? Do you begin sentences or paragraphs with ‘but’, ‘so’, ‘and’? Do you overuse with? What about run-on sentences? They’re clumsy and confuse the reader by going on and on and saying the same thing over and over and detailing too much that could have been said in shorter sentences that wouldn’t leave the reader thinking they’ve read this all before and are hearing it again and again? (See? That was awful, wasn’t it?)

What does this have to with writer ambition? Editing, baby. When I learned to be a better editor, my work improved and I found more publishers willing to accept what I submitted. You can have a unique plot and engaging characters, all the arcs in all the right places but if you can’t write in a compelling language no one’s going to take your story.

After you’ve edited the hell out of your short story or book send it in to as many publishers as you can. Beware those that don’t take simultaneous submissions unless you’re willing to wait for their acceptance or rejection. Many publishers say it’s all right to submit elsewhere as long as you inform them upon being accepted elsewhere. Don’t get a bad rep.

I don’t know how I’ve gotten accepted for publication this month three out of four times. One reason could well be that I’m not getting paid for it. Don’t let this discourage you or stop you from sending something in. Read the contract they send you. I’ve yet to see one that wants to retain the rights to my story. It always says that they want first rights only and if I get it published later they want credit for the original printing. In other words, ” ‘Wipires’ was originally published in 2019 by Altered Reality Magazine.” I can still send that short story to someone that does pay unless they specifically say in the submission guidelines they don’t take reprints.

Probably the reason I’ve been accepted is improved writing skills. Like any skill, it gets better the more you work it. Editing the words of others opened my eyes to what I’m doing wrong and reading the books of established writers can show you how to craft meaningful sentences. Study how they bring the characters to life and what they do to make you engage with that world you’re holding in front of your face. Create your own and see if someone else wants to come inside.

Here’s your exercise: take this post and edit it. If yours sounds better than mine I don’t want to know, okay?

Quarantined With Your Clock

We all have a lot of free time so you might as well write. Start submitting those short stories to online (and otherwise) magazines. You can find them on writer’s groups, Facebook and by subscribing to Author’s Publish Magazine. Google them, gird your loins with bravery and send them in. All they can say is no.

There is lots of writing advice out there you can get for free just by doing a web search. I’m a fine one to talk about boning up on creative writing since I have a ton of material I haven’t looked at yet but, I swear, I’m going to. On Monday while I’m off I’m going to force myself to turn off Netflix (the death of writing for me) and read.

http://critters.org/c/join.ht is the link to join a very nice writer’s critique group. My editor said one of the best ways to improve your own writing is to critique others. After you put some credits under your belt you can offer up your own work for criticism. So far I haven’t but I’m gonna do that, too.

Get out your old English textbook or find a free online creative writing course. I don’t think there’s a writer out there that can’t benefit from polishing their tools of the trade. You probably think you’re a fair grammarian but you might be wrong about that. English was my best subject in school but I was floored to find out how much I’d forgotten and how off base I was about things I’d assumed to be fact.

This may sound boring as all get-out but breaking out and reading the dictionary can’t possibly hurt you. While you’re at it, crack open a thesaurus. Words are a writer’s crown and you can’t be effective if you don’t know and love words. http://www.dictionary.com is just one example of online help, a port to a huge database of word spellings and meanings as well as origin. http://www.merriam-webster.com offers dictionary and thesaurus look ups as well as Word Of The Day and a tips and tricks feature for word help.

Right now we have an unprecedented chance to record some pretty wild history as it’s occurring. If you’re a fantasy or sci-fi writer this is golden, baby. Ask yourself a few questions: Was this virus created for nefarious reasons worthy of the Illuminati? How is it going to affect human immunity? What will we do if this thing mutates and we never get out of the house? Are we headed for another worldwide depression? Is your mother-in-law Patient X?

I consider myself very lucky to still be employed, unlike many of you out there in this uncertain time. With the help of God and each other we’ll get through this craziness just as we hurdle every obstacle in out path. Hang in there, cough into your elbow and we’ll make it.

Watching ‘Messiah’

“Raise up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it.”

That’s in the Bible. I believe in this holy book with all my heart. At the same time I’m a very disobedient child. There are warnings aplenty for those who say and don’t do. That they’ll be cut off. That they’ll reap the whirlwind.

What will I reap? What have I sown? Am I damned? Or is my faith so unshakable in the premise that my belief and acceptance of Christ is the foundation of Heaven and my salvation is not of works? This little light of mine seldom shines. The older I get, the more prodigal I feel.

Into my inner turmoil comes the Netflix presentation of ‘Messiah’, created by Michael Petroni who is also executive producer along with Mark Burnett, Roma Downey, James McTeigue (who doubles as director on six episodes with Kate Woods directing the other four) and Andrew Deane. The writers are Michael Bond, Amy-Louise Johnson, Michael Petroni, Kelly Wiles, Eoghan O’Donnell, Bruce Marshall Romans, Brandon Guercio, and Emily Silver.

Mehdi Dehbi has the title role of Al-Masih (Messiah), a poker-faced political dissident who attracts international attention by preaching during an unprecedented sandstorm that drives an invading army from Damascus. When it’s over he leads a group of refugees to the Israeli border only to abandon them. He miraculously (with the help of a chartered plane) reappears in Texas just as a tornado is about to land in a small town.

John Ortiz is Felix, the pastor of the only church in the tiny town of Dilley. His budget is in the red, his daughter is a hellion and his wife an alcoholic. Running away, his daughter escapes being blown away by hiding in a drainage tunnel where she is found by Al-Masih, earning him the gratitude of her parents. Felix becomes his most loyal disciple. At first, at least.

Michelle Monaghan plays Eva Geller, a widowed CIA agent with fertility problems. She smells a charlatan from the very beginning and sets out to prove it. Tomer Sisley plays her Shin Bet counterpart, Aviram Dahan, a man estranged from his family and haunted by the things he’s done for the sake of his job and Israel.

Outbidding Felix for the job of truest believer is Jibril (Sayyid El Alami), an illiterate Palestinian orphan who follows Al-Masih to the border and embodies symbolic protest when he braves gunfire to lead the refugees into the promised land. His pal Samir (Fares Landoulsi) is more skeptical and hangs around for lack of anything better to do. We can forgive him that because he reads The Little Prince to Jibril with such touching innocence in a war-weary setting. Both teenagers become pawns of a hard-line Muslim sect after their faces are plastered over television news shows.

The plots are predictable and the characters do what we imagine they would. This isn’t the fault of the actors, though, and the writers do form compelling story lines. Monaghan’s lovely face expresses such bitter determination and Sisley is downright scary in portraying a man so devoted to his job and nation he’ll do anything for them. Mehdi utters carefully worded platitudes that espouse no particular religion even as he draws on monotheistic themes. It’s no great wonder there. Islam, Christianity and Judaism are the only ones looking for a messiah.

Al-Masih draws heavily on the ideals of Jesus, all the while never claiming to be. His early-on healing of a boy shot on Temple Mount and walking on water at the Washington Memorial are evocative of the miracles of the Son of God. The intrepid Agent Geller uncovers his Iranian heritage and a brother who reveals they were raised by a magician uncle who taught the boys all his tricks. But how is he able to get under the skin of his Doubting Thomas nemeses with such unerring skill?

What this show gets right is the parallels between Christ and Al-Masih. Jesus was called a faker and religious rebel. Crowds thronged around both. The searchers, the desperate, the fearful all flock to this mysterious man. Discord is sown among those in doubt and rioting and looting are rampant both in America and the Holy Land. And when the wash gets hung on the line Felix, like Apostle Peter, is the first to hit the dirt.

I was reluctant to waste my time watching this at first but have concluded I’ll tune into season two. Why? I don’t believe they’ll try to put Al-Masih forward as a real messiah. I, as a Christian, believe He’s already been here, done that. What’s more likely to happen is Al-Masih being outed as a fake and The Amazing Randy going on tv to show how the walking on water was done. Someone’s bound to uncover footage of the boy’s “miraculous” healing of the gun shot being staged. What I’m going back for is to see how the writers finesse the mystery. Are they going to find a deeper meaning to the word “faith” or are they just going to dismiss believers as a bunch of weak fools who need the opiate of the masses?

Ecclesiastes 10:18

I’m a great believer in procrastination but I’m trying to get better. Who wouldn’t rather read a book or do anything but wash dishes? Drinking a beer while watching a movie is preferable to disposing of the junk piling up in my unused dining room. My stack of unsorted mail grows with every delivery.

My parents always said I was lazy and I can’t dispute that. Every time I drive up and see the unpainted fascia and moss-stained brick on my house I wince. Walk the dog, come in the back yard and there it is, a huge pile of crap waiting for a junk tag from the city to motivate me. This accretion of possibly usable stuff is a side effect of meth addiction. Hey! This might come in handy someday and I won’t have to buy it because it’s in a drawer or box or closet somewhere!

Late May of 2020 will be my one-year anniversary of being clean. I wanted to say sober but that wouldn’t be true. Before I began putting a needle in my arm damned near every day (and sometimes more than once a day), I drank quite a bit. Now that I’m off meth I’m drinking again.

Bad, bad, bad idea. Some people might think that’s okay but it’s not. Booze may not be against the law but it’s addictive and hard on the entire body. You won’t hear me trying to justify my consumption. I can’t. I know I’m an addict and what always seems to be a good idea at the time never is when it comes to substance abuse. The first week off meth had me eyeing the cold beer case at the neighborhood Walmart store. I chose the super-duper variety pack of Mike’s Hard Lemonade and ignored that little voice inside that said, “Aw, shit! Here we go again!”

As I sit and drink one or two or three beers and watch endless, but funny, videos of birds and cats on YouTube my house is falling apart. There’s a verse in the bible that says “by idleness of hands a house droppeth through.” Literally. The floor in front of my refrigerator got soft from a leak and now the tile floor has peeled away and the wood floor is flaking.

Getting off your duff and back into the real world is essential for every recovering addict. To put it in the vernacular, you just got to do it . It moves you away from the drug of choice and back to what you really need to be doing besides getting stoned. Despite my drinking, and while I am, I’ve forced myself to be more sociable, go to the gym, clean the house and continue writing. I don’t miss the meth, much, and I don’t drink at work. On my days off is another story.

Sarah Evans wrote a very good post on WordPress, Addiction’s Seismic Effects On The Family. I looked high and low for a place to comment on it because her heartbreak and love for her son is so clear. I wanted to tell her, as an addict, there’s nothing she can do to make it all better. She, her husband and the boy’s sister have done nothing wrong. They didn’t miss something somewhere along the way. It’s all on Sam. He’s the one walking on fire and he’ll be the one to determine when he’s tired of burning his feet. All you can do is continue to love him, even if you have to put him out of your life.

This I know: if I can stop a thirty-five year needle addiction I can quit drinking one day, too. Pray for me. Pray for the family of Ms. Evans.

I Have To Read It, Too

Lately I’ve had this habit of immersing myself in the things I watch or read. If I watch it, I’m likely to read it or vice versa. Sherlock Holmes. The Outsider by Stephen King. This time it’s The Stranger, Harlan Coben’s Netflix creation based on his book.

I know, right? Netflix again but I’ve found it to be a treasure trove of good writing brought to the screen, either from original material or derived from books, comics and graphic novels. I’ve read Mr. Coben before so when I saw he was associated with the show I jumped on it. The Stranger is a complex drama with multiple plot lines managed so well they mesh without confusing the hell out of you.

How do writers do this? First you have to start with a plot guaranteed to snag a reader with no more than the synopsis on the back cover. Coben writes crime thrillers. Very good ones. With The Stranger he might have done something like this: major plot, a blackmailer. Ok. Let’s make her a woman, less threatening upon first approach to her female targets. Young and attractive to make her initially alluring to the men. She would have to be clever and determined. Ruthless. Even her own father isn’t safe.

The first victim we see her approach is a lawyer. She tells him his wife faked a pregnancy, hands him a packet of information that includes a bogus sonogram, then walks out. The lawyer’s father, a philanderer, is informed he has an illegitimate child he doesn’t know about. A bakery owner gets hit up for ten-thousand pounds (the show is filmed in England) to safeguard her daughter from being exposed as an online prostitute. Two of these three are the unwitting secondary victims of The Stranger, the ones the primary victim doesn’t want to know their secrets. The lawyers wife tells him, “This isn’t what you think.” She asks him to give her a few days and she’ll explain everything then promptly goes missing. It’s the first branching of the main plot.

Naturally, it helps to spread the story over several episodes so the viewer can get a real feel for the characters, dive right into their convoluted lives. Their children form just one of the subplots. The first episode opens with a decapitated alpaca, a teenage rave party and the discovery the following day of one of the party goers naked and unconscious in the woods. A headless alpaca? Fake pregnancy, complete with a pretend belly? Yes, bizarre but not inconceivable.

That ‘s Coben’s genius. Weave the weird in with what would, for the police, be a routine murder/blackmail/missing person case. Throw in a mother with Munchausen by proxy, a dirty cop with his thumb in a nasty pie and a man refusing let the wrecking ball ruin his home…for a very dark reason. It makes a juicy story, rich in details, occupied by people whose layers are revealed one page at a time as The Stranger glides among them, capitalizing on their sins.

Daniel Brocklehurst, Mick Ford, Harlan Coben, Charlotte Coben (Daddy’s little girl) and Karla Crome have done a knockout job of writing this suspenseful series. They’re ably directed by Hannah Quinn and Daniel O’Hara. The main actors are Richard Armitage as Adam Price, the beleaguered attorney, Siobhan Finneran as DS Johanna Griffin, a cop investigating her best friend’s murder. Anthony Head, as Adam’s father Ed Price, adds polish with his smooth delivery. Hannah John-Kamen is The Stranger, whose pretty face hides a cold heart. The supporting cast members are multi-cultural and well played. For in depth details and trailers go to IMDB.

When I went to hunt for a new show yesterday to watch I wasn’t particularly impressed with the browse blurb or the trailer. It was like, yeah yeah yawn. Then I saw the words Harlan Coben. I’ve read The Five and Tell No One and thought they were absolutely marvelous. Coben has won the Anthony, Shamus and Edgar awards, the first writer to receive all three. I can see why. His novels have more twists than a Twizzler.

So, let’s summarize: start with a compelling plot, fold in multiple subplots that are closely woven to the main one, blend in complex characters whose eccentricities are fleshed out in a convincing manner. Sprinkle liberally with enigmas. Drive the story with your foot to the floor on a road as smooth as glass and you’ll have a thrilling mystery readers won’t want to miss.

.

Whatever…

It’s gone pretty well, getting off my ever-widening ass. I still haven’t signed up for the gym or gone to get on blood pressure meds but I have gotten things done. Of course, I have to make myself. My pet sin out of the seven deadlies is sloth. I’m here to admit to laziness. I’d much rather watch a movie or read a book than do the dishes. Is there someone out there who’d disagree? They must be lying or crazy. You do not want to clean the bathroom more than you want to watch Joker. Liar or lunatic. Which are you?

What I’ve done is make myself scrub before I can watch. (Okay, I watched Joker first but cleaned out the fish tank all the same) I cooked a pot of stew and at least thought about the dishes. My 35-year-old son whose primary responsibility seems to be taking care of the animals and dicking off, should be doing them. I do the working and bill-paying. Why the hell should I load the dishwasher? Huh?

My primary goal today was to get the property taxes paid and I did that. Well, except for two hundred dollars. Don’t want to go in the red, do I? That would precipitate having to borrow money from someone I have a goal of paying back money I already owe. This is how you get ahead while still being behind. I just sent him a text about doing that the next time he’s closer than the 35 miles he lives from me. (I don’t want to get too ambitious. Small steps are best.)

My future goals are:

  1. Quit drinking. Or at least stop opening my first beer at 10:30 a.m.
  2. Fix up the house. Since the old man says to wait until he gets out of prison, this is achievable.
  3. Get the electrical work done on said house. I don’t give a damn what he says, I don’t want to burn.
  4. Get on blood pressure meds. This might help stave off dementia. Or else admit I’d rather have a stroke than Alzheimer’s.
  5. Improve the quality of life in my saving account. It’s very dormant.

I can do this. I can. I will.

This Has Gone Too Far

I had assumed that Jason Ralph taking a hiatus from The Magicians was because he’d decided to pursue another job, perhaps a cinematic film role. Let’s get real. For what other reason would an actor leave a hit show except to achieve an even greater role to advance his or her career? Some of them pull both, a tv show and a movie part. Roll the dice and see which comes up seven.

This week I read that this might not be the case here. Quentin Coldwater (Ralph’s SyFy doppelganger) could well be the victim of sexual/racial politics. https://thefederalist.com/2020/01/28/after-offing-quentin-for-the-crime-of-being-a-white-male-the-magicians-is-falling-apart/ Follow this link for more information on the mystery.

The British version of the Academy Awards, BAFTA, was awash in speeches in favor of inclusion. I’m in favor of inclusion but not at the expense of honoring what’s best in awards ceremonies and a hit tv show I love. Was Joaquin Phoenix the right guy for the Best Actor award? I don’t know. I’ve watched Joker but haven’t gotten around to all of the nominated films to cast my vote. And the powers that be don’t care. I’m not on the nominating committees and I don’t get a say in who wins either a BAFTA, Oscar or Golden Globe.

I think Denzel Washington richly deserved his Oscar win for Training Day over Russell Crowe in A Beautiful Mind but I didn’t see Halle Berry’s performance in Monster Ball as all that earth shaking. She’s done better. That’s just my opinion. Show me a gay actor nominated for a major award and I’ll tell you whether I think they should have won or not. Jodie Foster in Silence of the Lambs? Oh, hell yes. Marlon Brando, who was bisexual, won twice. I didn’t know Kevin Spacey was gay and I don’t care. He’s a great actor but I think he turned in a better perfomance in Seven.

Two very good movies have been made about gay rock stars and the question was asked: Why weren’t gay men cast in the roles? I’ll tell you. Can you imagine anyone better for the part of Freddie Mercury than Rami Malik once the no doubt painful orthodontia was put into his mouth? And need I remind everyone Malik got the Oscar that year? I knew he would because he deserved it. Playing a gay man had nothing to do with it, or at least I hope not. Indeed, the film downplays Mercury’s sexual preference. In one scene reporters are hammering the band with questions about Freddy coming out. He asks, Can’t we get back to the music, people? That’s what Mercury was about. His music.

Taron Egerton was cast as Elton John in Rocketman because he looks like John. And sings like him, too. Yes, that’s Egerton doing the vocals and he studied piano so his playing would look realistic even though David Hartley is the one we hear banging the 88s. The guy worked his butt off for this part. It was a casting decision based on what was best for the production, not political correctness. In the one love scene Egerton throws himself at Richard Madden (Game of Thrones) with all the gusto of a man releasing his true nature. While neither man is gay, that I know of, they did the scene with convincing lust. They call it acting, folks. You don’t have to be it to play it.

I’m getting off-point a little bit. The brouhaha over Quentin Coldwater is that the character is too white, too heterosexual and too normative. (Is that the new way to say normal? Just asking.) The gist of the issue is that we need to explore other ways of being, such as female, LGBTQ, and people of color. But wait! Quentin has had more than a fling with Eliot. So the real issue here is that Quentin is white. It must be.

Who do we have left in The Magicians? We have Penny, a character of East Indian extract, Eliot, a gay man, Josh, another heterosexual man but with sexaully-transmitted lycanthropy, and the women, Julia, Kady, Margot and Alice. (Hey! None of them are black!) I love all these characters and don’t give a damn what they look like or who they sleep with. I love them for who and what they are and the wiz-bang of their spells. That’s what’s up but the producers and writers are bowing to the objections of the Hollywood left.

Boo. Booooo!

Can’t you just let us sit back and enjoy the show? Why does politics have to enter into it at all? I know, I know. Without an aggressive push nothing would ever change and media is the best way to get new ideas over since, as a nation, we all have our heads down staring at our cell phones or our attention on the television screen. The Magicians has a pretty varied cast even though Penny (Arjun Gupta) and Dean Fogg (Rick Worthy) are the only main splash of color.

Hale Appleman, bisexual onscreen and homosexual off, plays Eliot, possibly my favorite character on the show. They’re all so well-portrayed it’s hard to pick just one to be at the top of my list. I love Margot (Summer Bishil) for her bitchitude. Kady (Jade Tailor) is absolutely going to do what she has to in order to pull off the next big thing. Josh (Trevor Einhorn) is endearingly lovable and an enthusiastic cook. Alice (Olivia Dudley) is downright deadly. Penny is funny as hell and the one guy that can teleport. Julia (Stella Maeve) is, in my eyes, the top magician in the group. But, come on folks, Quentin is the main character. He’s who the Lev Grossman books are based on.

Quentin is the heart and soul of the stories, a flawed, insecure man who was ready to cut his wrists until Brakebill’s University for wizards showed him he wasn’t crazy, he was a damned magician. He was obsessed with the mythical world of Fillory, which he just thought to be a fictional book realm, until he found it and took all the other main characters there. He’s at the heart of the show and they want to cut him out because he’s not politically expedient. That’s more than just wrong.

Although Quentin—spoiler alert here—sacrifices himself to save the world of magic, does that mean he’s not coming back to the series? Penny did. They managed to make a plot arc involving multiple time lines and brought Penny over from one of them when our Penny was already dead and employed in the underworld library. Will the writers of this wonderful show find a way to do the same with Quentin? Or is he too white bread?

Shouldn’t inclusion mean everyone gets to play kickball on the playground? Bring Quentin back to the game. The viewers miss him. We’re what it’s all about.